- Elise and Barry’s September 2014 honeymoon became a nightmare when they heard Bobby was in hospital
- The truth later came out in court that Bobby’s uncle Andrew Nolan had attacked him and Bobby was left fighting for life
- Recently, Elise and her family gathered more than 81,000 signatures to help keep Bobby’s attacker behind bars
- Bobby, now 12, is still smiling and loves music and surfing
Here Elise Webber, 38, tells her own story in her own words.
Staring at my seven-month-old son’s tiny body snaked in hospital wires, I willed him to live.
Please hold on, baby, I sobbed.
Just four days earlier, Bobby had been the pageboy as his dad, Barry, then 39, and I exchanged vows.
It was one of the happiest days of our life.
Jetting to the Gold Coast for our honeymoon, we left Bobby and our girl Olivia, then four, with my mum.
My sister and her partner Andrew were on standby in case Mum needed a hand. Andrew was like a brother to me.
But just two days into our trip, in September 2014, our world was turned upside down when we got a call from my sister, urging us to come home. Bobby had been rushed to hospital, after she suspected he’d suffered an allergic reaction.
She and Mum had gone to a drive-in movie and left Bobby in Andrew’s care while Olivia was looked after by another relative. When my sister came home, Bobby was limp and unresponsive in his cot.
Barry and I boarded the first fight home, rushing to Bobby’s side at Sydney Children’s Hospital. But before we could see him, we were pulled into a separate room by a doctor and social worker.
‘We suspect Bobby has been abused,’ he said.
Andrew said he’d fallen asleep during babysitting duties and suggested someone must have broken in and hurt Bobby.
Our precious baby had multiple skull fractures from blunt force trauma, burst blood vessels in his eyes from being shaken violently, carpet burn marks on his forehead, fractured vertebrae and bite marks on his body.
‘I hope you find them before I do,’ Andrew told police.
I felt sick at the thought that someone had tortured my baby like this on purpose. Andrew had been in our lives for 12 years, was great with kids, and loved Bobby. I had no reason not to trust him.
Deep down though, something felt off.
‘Doctors warned us Bobby would never recover’
‘Did you do this to my son?’ I asked him.
‘You know I never would,’ he hugged me.
Doctors warned us Bobby would never recover.
Not wanting to prolong our baby’s agony, on doctors advice, we made the heart-wrenching decision to turn off his life support after a week.
‘Bobby isn’t well,’ we told a confused and terrified Olivia.
We had Bobby christened as we waited for the inevitable.
Despite all odds, our little fighter began breathing unaided.
‘Our boy is back!’ I cried as my tiny son defied doctors’ expectations.
Our prayers had been answered.
But having suffered a traumatic brain injury, Bobby faced an uphill battle.
He’d been left quadriplegic, with severe brain damage, epilepsy, cerebral palsy and was visually impaired.
Soon everyone began calling him ‘Bobby the Brave’ as he fought.
A month later he was transferred to Nepean Hospital to continue recovering, but sadly was still deemed palliative.
Despite our joy that Bobby had survived, the horror continued when Andrew was arrested for Bobby’s heinous attack.
‘No!’ I wept in disbelief.
How could a member of our family commit the ultimate betrayal – bashing our son to within an inch of his life?
When Bobby returned home that November, we felt blessed, but the reality of his irreparable injuries was devastating.
As we grappled with Bobby’s 24-hour care, learning to tube feed him and administer medication, he heartbreakingly cried out in pain. Shock gave way to grief as I thought of the independence he’d never have.
Riddled with guilt, Barry and I blamed ourselves for leaving the children, and my sister and mother blamed themselves too.
In counselling, we were told most relationships would break in our situation. ‘That’s not going to happen to us,’ I vowed to Barry. We had to be strong for our family.
‘Of course not,’ he smiled back.
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On Bobby’s second birthday in February 2016, Andrew Nolan, then 34, appeared in the Gosford District Court, pleading guilty to causing grievous bodily harm with intent.
He’d admitted to putting his foot on Bobby’s back and rubbing him along the carpet, hitting him twice with an open hand and throwing him into his cot, but provided no explanation as to why he’d unleashed the
sickening attack.
Still, it didn’t account for the full extent of our boy’s injuries, some of which were described by a doctor as being consistent with severe shaking or impact, such as a motor vehicle accident.
In October we returned to Gosford District Court where I channelled Bobby’s bravery to deliver my victim impact statement.
‘You have taken from Bobby the life he was supposed to have lived… I hope my son’s face haunts you for the rest of your days.’
As I stared at Nolan he avoided my gaze but I was determined that he’d hear my words.
In December in Darlinghurst Courthouse, he was sentenced to 12 years and six months with a non-parole period of eight years and six months.
‘ I channelled Bobby’s bravery to deliver my victim impact statement’
Barry and I reeled. Our family had been handed a life sentence, yet Andrew would be able to rebuild his life in his 40s.
Thankfully in May 2017, after we’d successfully appealed, Nolan’s sentence was increased to 15 years and three months, with a non-parole period of 11 years and six months, after it was found the original
sentence fell ‘well short of adequately reflecting the gravity of the offence.’
It still didn’t seem nearly enough, but we remained steadfast in our efforts to give Bobby and Olivia a happy upbringing.
Incredibly, that year, aged three, Bobby was discharged from palliative care and transferred to rehabilitation. It was monumental – our boy was going to live.
Over the years, we worked hard on Bobby’s speech and physio and with many other therapists, worked to improve his swallow reflex so he could eat normally again.
He also underwent numerous eye surgeries due to a detached retina in his right eye from being shaken, as well as a gruelling nine-hour op to reconstruct his hips due to hip dysplasia.
Bobby started daycare when he was three and loved it, then went to a special school aged four and a half, where he made a group of fabulous friends.
With each year, my boy grew and loved zooming around independently on his walker. Despite the hurdles he faced, our unstoppable Bobby kept improving.
The epilepsy he’d been left with went into remission and he began to speak more words than I’d ever imagined.
He even joined the special abilities cheerleading team, Iron Heart. We loved watching to see the joy on his face as he performed with the team.
‘Bobby started daycare when he was three and loved it’
It was fitting for the boy who’s been cheered on by a group of online supporters through our Facebook page, aptly named Bobby the Brave, since his release from hospital.
As we shared every milestone with Bobby’s army, they constantly praised his strength. You’re the man! they’d say.
Then last December, as Nolan’s parole hearing neared, I gathered every ounce of strength I had to write a statement to the State Parole Authority.
I also launched a petition, gathering more than 81,000 signatures to help keep Bobby’s attacker behind bars where he belongs.
We were ecstatic when I got a call in February to say Nolan’s parole had been denied.
I’ll never forgive Nolan.
We’ll fight every year to make sure his parole is denied – you can’t rehabilitate a monster.
And I’m fighting for a serious offenders register to help other families and victims.
READ MORE: Honeymooning couple rush home to their baby shaken so hard he was blinded
Over time, our family has healed from the pain.
Now 12, Bobby is able to smile and laugh, and has learned to say a few key words, including, Mum, Dad, Livia, more, and no.
He loves music, with an eclectic taste ranging from Celine Dion to Metallica and loves to dance around with our help.
He’s also a water baby and adores catching waves with the Disabled Surfers Association.
Bobby’s big sister Olivia, now 16, is her brother’s fiercest supporter and a wonderful young carer who helps out too.
Despite all he’s endured, Bobby inspires me every day.
He is my sunshine.
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