- Kylie Bailey, 47, from Gumeracha, SA suffered abuse from her stepdad, Jeffrey Thomas Brant, when she was just a child
- During the abuse, Jeffrey Thomas Brant told her that no one would believe her
- Kylie stayed silent for 43 years, but now she’s jailed her stepfather – twice
Here, she shares her story in her own words...
Warning: The contents of this article contain graphic content
As my stepdad Jeffrey Thomas Brant, then 25, pushed me on the see-saw, I laughed.
He’d been such a doting parent to me and my baby brother, Matthew, coming into our lives six months after our parents split up.
While our mum Ann, then 28, was working late nights at an electrical shop, Jeff would pick us up from daycare and cook us dinner.
But soon Jeff began to express his affection in other ways.
‘I knew something was terribly wrong.’
When he was bathing me, his hands strayed to my private areas.
‘I love you,’ he’d tell me. ‘It’s our secret. No need to tell Mum.’
Aged just three, I still knew something was terribly wrong.
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Jeff moved in the following year and, as I got older, he’d touch me whenever he could get me alone.
It happened in the shower and in my bedroom at night.
‘This will teach you what to do when you’ve got a boyfriend. Don’t tell anyone,’ he instructed.
He also made me touch him in ways that made my skin crawl.
From the outside we were a picture perfect family, but in reality the man who was meant to protect me was subjecting me to the most abhorrent abuse.
I lived walking on eggshells, with nowhere to hide or escape.
But as the years passed, my defiance grew.
‘I’m telling Mum,’ I shouted after Jeff touched me again.
‘I’ll go to jail. You’ll break Mum’s heart,’ he threatened me.
Other times he told me no-one would believe me or that it would hurt Mum if I ever reported him.
Mum married Jeff in 1989 when I was 11. Though I plastered on a smile deep inside it broke me. How could I ever tell Mum the truth now?
The man she was giving her life to was a sick, twisted monster.
As a result of the abuse, my school grades suffered. My dream of being a teacher shattered along with my confidence.
When I was 13, Jeff gave me my first drink – a can of Jim Beam and cola.
‘He’d give me alcohol before abusing me.’
Sipping the sickly sweet liquid numbed my pain.
From then on he regularly plied me with alcohol as well as cannabis when Mum was at work.
Then he’d take me for a drive. Pulling up at a local playground, he’d give me alcohol before abusing me.
I was completely powerless to stop him.
Desperate to escape my shame, I began drinking all the time.
‘Why are you doing this?’ Mum asked, devastated by my bad behaviour.
Still, I couldn’t tell the truth and break her heart.
By the time I was 14, Jeff’s abuse stopped, but the burden of the terrible secret festered inside me.
Unable to concentrate at school, and subjected to bullying that I had no confidence to stand up to, I dropped out when I was 15.
Two years later, I met Daniel, then 20, at a party.
His kindness calmed me, and within weeks I was living with him.
Confiding to Daniel about my abusive stepfather was a huge relief.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said.
Daniel and I went on to marry when I was 25, and welcomed three beautiful boys.
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Living just down the road from Mum, we saw her and Jeff constantly.
He made my flesh crawl and still Mum was oblivious.
But becoming a mother myself, my protectiveness went into overdrive as I constantly worried my boys would be hurt too.
Thankfully I knew Jeff wasn’t interested in young boys, but the thought of my sons ever suffering the pain and shame I’d experienced tortured me.
As the years passed, Jeff’s face continued to haunt my every waking hour, and even in my sleep.
When my marriage broke down in 2015, despite us having other problems I knew it was due in part to the abuse wrecking my ability to communicate.
When I met a new partner three years later and disclosed the abuse, he encouraged me to speak to someone.
‘Would anyone believe me?’ I worried.
In January 2019, I finally spoke to a counsellor, who gave me the strength to go to the police where I gave an official statement.
To be heard and believed at last meant the world.
But I still had to tell Mum. She remained married to Jeff and blissfully unaware of his disgusting secret.
So a few days later I called and invited her and my auntie Sharon to stay.
‘All the colour drained from her face.’
But when her phone rang back it was Jeff.
‘Is this about what I did to you?’ he asked.
I hung up – hoping my damning silence spoke volumes.
When Mum visited with my auntie, I took a deep breath… ‘Jeff abused me when I was younger, for years,’ I said.
All the colour drained from Mum’s face as she burst into tears.
‘How could I not have known?’ she said, racked with guilt.
‘It’s not your fault, Mum,’ I soothed.
Never doubting me for a moment, she immediately broke things off with Jeff.
Next, I sat my boys down.
‘Poppa has done some horrible things. He’s not a nice person,’ I said sadly. ‘Nanna has asked him to leave.’
The boys were shocked to their core.
My stepfather was finally charged.
In May 2022 – more than 40 years since the abuse began – Jeff, then 66, fronted court, charged with maintaining an unlawful sexual relationship with a child.
He pleaded not guilty but the jury didn’t buy it.
He was jailed for 13 years.
Jeff appealed and, six months later, my world was upended when he was released.
I fell into a deep depression and my relationship broke down.
My wonderful boys were the only thing that kept me going.
Determined to regain the power, I clawed my way back to health and found the strength to fight the appeal.
During the process I waived my right to anonymity in the court system, meaning Jeff could be named and the world would know about his sick secret.
‘I faced my evil abuser.’
When I told my eldest son Jayden the full extent of Jeff’s sickening abuse, he was devastated and angry.
‘Mum, I’m so sorry this happened to you,’ he gasped
Last January I was joined by Jayden, then 19, Mum, Auntie Sharon and Daniel at the District Court in South Australia to see Jeffrey Thomas Brant, 68, found guilty once again.
Ahead of his sentencing, I faced my evil abuser.
When he looked at me there was never even a shred of remorse.
‘It’s not my shame, my guilt, my dirty secret, my heinous acts, but yours,’ I said, reading aloud my victim impact statement.
‘You have placed on me a lifelong sentence I never deserved or asked for. I will never forgive you.’
Mum also read a victim impact statement.
‘I never stood a chance to protect my little girl and as a mother this is unbearable. You have left us trying to put a bandaid on a bullet hole,’ she said bravely.
That August, Judge Ian Press sentenced him to 12 years and six months jail – after taking into account the time Brant had spent in custody for the previous sentence – with a non-parole period of eight years.
He said Brant had continued to deny his offending and had shown no remorse.
After the court case, survivors of sexual abuse reached out on Facebook from all over the world.
Hearing their stories gave me strength to rebuild my life.
Mum, now 72, remains my best friend, and going through this has only made our relationship stronger.
READ MORE TRUE CRIME: Sex abuse survivor Gisele Pelicot confronts her husband in court
My three boys, now aged 20, 17, and 12, are the real loves of my life.
And I’m so glad Mum has also found love with her new partner Danny.
I want all survivors of abuse to speak up and be heard.
I kept quiet for 43 years and I’m proof that justice can still be done.
I won’t be silenced ever again and I encourage others to do the same. No matter what you’ve been through, you deserve to thrive, not just survive.
If you’ve been affected by this story, call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 (Aus) or Safe To Talk on 0800 044 334 (NZ).
