- Kristin Cooke, 33, came out as trans when he was 25 years old.
- A few years later, his wife Ashley gave birth to their first child – and Kristin realised he wanted to carry their next baby.
- After telling Ashley, the couple set about making it happen and Kristine gave birth to baby Kaysen.
- He shares his journey online as @guy_named_kristin
Here Kristin tells his story in his own words
‘I think God messed up,’ I confessed to my mum Beverly. ‘He gave me a boy’s brain instead of a girl’s brain.’
Aged eight, I was starting to realise that I was different from other little girls. While my classmates liked to wear pretty pink dresses and play with dolls, I was drawn to toy cars and Lego, liked to wear T-shirts and shorts, and preferred building forts with the boys.
‘You’re perfect just the way you are,’ Mum said.
Mum and my dad, Rick, had adopted me when I was 10 days old. The home we shared with my siblings, Hannah, then four, and Erik, 11, was full of love.
But school was tough, as I was bullied for being different. In high school, I caught myself checking out other girls, and at 16 I came out to my family as a lesbian. Mum held me and we cried happy tears.
When I was 20, I met a lovely girl named Ashley, then also 20, at work. An animal lover, Ashley enjoyed knitting, and board games.
We shared a love for the outdoors and going hiking.
Quickly becoming best friends, we were inseparable.
We’d been besties for a few months when I started to look at loving, caring Ashley in a new light. I have feelings for her.
Playing pool one day, Ashley confessed her feelings for me.
‘I love you too,’ I smiled.
Ashley had never been with a woman, but there was no doubt we were falling for each other.
We started dating, and our relationship soon blossomed into something special.
Then one day, Mum put on a documentary.
Called Becoming Chaz, it followed singer Cher’s child’s transition from female to male aged 40.
Stealing sideways glances at Mum as we watched, something about Chaz’s story resonated with me.
‘I kept it to myself, unsure how Ashley would react.’
Madly in love, I proposed to Ashley two years on.
‘Yes!’ she beamed.
We had a special ceremony with our loved ones in September 2013, then made it official once same sex marriage was finally legalised.
I was over the moon, but there was still something eating away at me. Then I remembered the doco I’d watched with Mum.
Without saying anything to Ashley, I went down a rabbit hole online on YouTube, searching for videos about people transitioning.
The more I watched, particularly those where people assigned female at birth transitioned to live as their true male selves, the more I could relate.
That’s who I am too, I thought.
Deep down I’d known it all along – I was a man.
I kept it to myself, unsure how Ashley would react.
But two years later, when I was 25, it spilled out.
‘Ashley was comforting.’
‘I’m trans,’ I told Ashley, through tears, finally coming out.
Wrapping me up in a cuddle, Ashley was comforting, but she was also confused.
After I gave her space to process my news, a week later she sat me down.
‘I read a quote online that said, “If it’s important, you’ll find a way”,’ she said.
It was her way of telling me she was in this with me, no matter what.
Coming out to my family too, I felt supported.
Two months later, I began taking testosterone. My voice became lower and I grew thick hair on my chest and legs.
Over a few months, my DD cup breasts shrank down to a C cup.
Some days I could tell Ashley was grieving the wife she’d married, and trying to come to terms with now having a husband.
‘You’re the same person underneath,’ she’d smile.
Three years after I’d come out as trans, in 2018, Ashley came home one day excited.
‘I think it’s time for us to have a baby,’ she said.
Finding a sperm donor, after three months of at-home insemination, Ashley fell pregnant! It was so beautiful watching Ashley carry our baby.
Meeting our daughter, Scarlet, in March 2019 was the most magical moment of my life. I was so proud to be her dad.
‘I want to give birth to our next one,’ I smiled to Ashley.
As I still had my female reproductive organs, I could try to get pregnant.
‘Let’s do it,’ Ashley said.
‘Your daddy’s going to have a baby,’
I stopped taking testosterone in November 2020 and, finding another sperm donor, I did at-home insemination.
Doing a pregnancy test when Scarlet was four, Ashley and I were thrilled when two tell-tale pink lines appeared.
‘Your daddy’s going to have a baby,’ we told Scarlet.
As the weeks passed, my body changed and it felt surreal to be pregnant.
It wasn’t the body I was used to seeing, but I felt blessed to be growing our precious baby.
‘I love you baby,’ Scarlet said to my belly.
As my bump grew, I got shocked stares out and about, and some people made nasty comments.
‘Your kids will be confused,’ they’d say, cruelly.
But I never bought into the negativity. Our kids were so loved and that was all that mattered.
After a relatively smooth pregnancy, on Christmas Day last year, a beautiful gift arrived six weeks earlier than expected
– our son, Kaysen.
‘I’m so humbled to be able to breastfeed him.’
Cradling him after I gave birth, I was captivated.
Our tiny boy weighed 2.5 kilos but he was healthy.
After 10 days in the NICU, he came home and we settled into life as a family of four.
Now three months old, Kaysen is such a cuddly bub.
And I’m so humbled to be able to breastfeed him.
Ashley and I love our family and wouldn’t change a thing.
Love comes in all shapes and sizes, and everybody is deserving of it.
Ashley, 34, says:
Creating a family together has been the most special thing.
Seeing my husband give birth to Kaysen was beautiful.
And what an incredible thing it is to say our boy’s dad gave birth to him.
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