Constance Hall: My anxiety over impending exhaustion

She due to deliver her unborn son on the 28^th but mummy blogger Constance Hall has revealed she’s been suffering with worries about her ‘impending exhaustion’.

Taking to her Facebook page, Constance – who is expecting her fifth child – spoke about the reality of motherhood.

‘For the last 9 months I’ve had anxiety over my impending exhaustion,’ she wrote.

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Baby update..... I had a doctors appointment yesterday and our baby boy is looking healthy and happy. On Friday he'll be 36 weeks but he's measuring 40 weeks 😱😱😱. My gestational diabetes was negative so he's just a really big boy. I've decided against a Vbac (vaginal birth after delivery.) thanks everyone for your stories and advice. I read some terribly sad stories and incredibly empowering ones, the decision came down a couple of factors, mainly body damage, one of my mates has a prolapsed arse and another has a prolapsed vag and the fact that I already have an inflamed bowel disease I just feel that I owe my anus more then this. My worst Vag delivery took 5 months to heal from, my C section took 3 weeks. I'm not justifying my decision, in 2018 Queen make decisions about their bodies, no justification needed. But this one took a lot of back and forth. Denim is all Zen and natural, he'd pull the baby out in the river and chew threw the cord if he could. So when I heard him tell me that he'd prefer I had a C section I fell a little more in love with him. It's my decision, but his opinion counts. So we scheduled in a C section for the 28th, that was the earliest they'd give me. All my babies have been premature and Arlo was a 1.5 hour delivery, I live a 1.5 hour drive to the hospital and I held back tears when the doctor warned me that there is no guarantee I'll make it in time for my C section.. So it's pretty clear that I'll be giving birth in my car with my swollen rectum hanging down around my knees to one of those sumo babies that looks 6 months old. I'll keep you posted. Ps the 20% off Mother's Day sale is still happening!!!

‘No matter how experienced you are with babies there is an inevitable period of time that’s so exhausting that normal human functioning becomes next to impossible.

‘Having twin new borns and 2 other kids 5 and under I’ve been so tired that I vomited or suffered a migraine when I was woken up, which at one point was every 30 minutes.

'It was another level of tired the kind of tired that makes you prey for morning, for the torture to just stop.’

She went on to say her partner, Denim, has reassured her that he will take the new baby so she can sleep.

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What does stomping on a cockroach, slapping a mosquito, eating a steak and using antibiotics to kill a virus all have in common? They are all ending life..... You see life itself isn't sacred. Not when you live on a fertile planet, compatible with all sorts of life. So what makes life inside a mothers stomach sacred? One very distinct difference... Choice. The growing baby inside it's mother is sacred because she chose to mother it. Not because it began to grow. All of my children know that I had the choice to mother them. You see life can be created out of rape, it can even be created in a form that isn't compatible with life and will die before birth. It isn't always sacred. It's just life. Ireland is about to have a referendum, repealing the 8th amendment. Because the children and women of Ireland deserve more. Abortions must be legalised in Ireland because they will happen anyway. Women will stop an unwanted pregnancy legally or illegally, you are only voting on if she will do it safely or stressfully. And every child needs to know that they are more then just life, they were a choice a sacred decision and not a punishment to their mother for creating life. On May the 25th vote YES to repeal the 8th. I certainly wouldn't fuck with an Irish women's freedom. #repealthe8th #Irishqueens #prochoice #choiceissacred

‘But we all know.... true colours are exposed at 2am when your wife and baby are covered in sh*t bawling their eyes out together,’ she went on with trademark candour.

Constance said she wants to trust that things will be ‘fair’ between them once the baby comes.

‘But from what I witness all around me women have become very good at being exhausted,’ she wrote.

‘I believe in equal rights for mothers and fathers, I believe in the equal importance in their roles..

'I just don’t believe we have reached equality in our homes yet and until we do women will be left learning to accept and men learning to expect our exhaustion.’

This article originally appeared on New Idea.