Kim Patrick, 43, Maroochydore, Qld
Clearing the plates after dinner, I rested my hand on my daughter Rebekah's shoulder. 'You need to get that maths homework done,' I reminded her.
'I've done it already,' she growled, shrugging my hand off.
Taken aback, I retreated to the kitchen. Where's this moody Rebekah come from? I thought.
She was only nine, but over the past few months I'd noticed some backchat and pre-teen stroppiness developing. That night I thought about what to do.
I need to nip this behaviour in the bud, I decided.
Scribbling on a piece of paper, I suddenly realised I'd started writing a list of positive attributes I wanted in my daughter.
I love the way I always talk so nicely, I'd written, imagining the words in her mouth. I love the way I keep my room tidy.
I'd also written things which were true. It's great I'm always so helpful, I continued. I love having such good friends.
Eventually, I ended up with 50 sentences on my list.
Now, what am I going to do with these? I wondered.
Suddenly an idea came to me. I could use my hand-held voice recorder to put them all on a CD and play them to Rebekah while she slept.
After various courses and counselling sessions, I'd learnt how powerful the unconscious mind could be during sleep. The resting brain takes things on board because there's no outside resistance.
Over the next week I recorded the sentences. Next I got some gentle backing music put on the 40-minute CD. Then it was ready.
One night soon after, I crept into Rebekah's room as she was drifting off to sleep.
'I've got something for you to listen to,' I whispered, popping the CD in her CD player.
Going to bed, I kept my fingers crossed.
The next morning Rebekah came bounding into the kitchen, her CD player in hand.
'I want to listen to my compliments CD again at breakfast,' she said, plugging it in.
I watched in surprise as she made her peanut-butter sandwich and smiled along to her CD.
That night she asked me to put it on in her room. I was amazed that within just a few days, I was already seeing results.
There was no more answering back, her room gradually got neater and Rebekah was a joy to be around again.
If it works on Rebekah, I'll try it on the boys, I decided.
So I made CDs for my sons David, now 17, Kieren, now 15, and Sam, now 14.
'I like to help around the house without being asked,' I read into the tape recorder. 'I always listen to my teachers.'
I wasn't sure the boys would like the compliments as much as Rebekah. So this time I made sure they were sound asleep when I played the CDs.
Again, I was astounded by the changes that followed.
'I might clean out the kitchen cupboards for you,' Kieran announced one day soon after.
Eventually, I confessed to him about the CD.
'That wouldn't work on me,' Kieran frowned.
I smiled, knowing better!
After telling all my friends about the idea I've been busy making heaps of new CDs for their children.
I've got one for a bed-wetter, one for an ADHD child, and one for a preschooler.
I know the CDs aren't the only means of changing a child's behaviour, but it all helps. And being able to parent while I'm asleep is definitely the stuff of dreams!
To learn more about tapping into the unconscious mind - click here. You can also chat to Kim in our Forums about her unique teen-taming techniques. |
